Too Damn Seriously

I take myself too damn seriously!

If recognizing the problem is part of the solution, then I thought I better just admit it now. I sometimes forget that I am not perfect and that I don't have to be perfect and that, even if I HAD to be perfect or suffer terrible consequences, I couldn't be perfect.

I think this obsession with perfection comes with growing up Mormon, where there is always a right way. And that right way is both straight and narrow. I remember my ex-step mom telling me that even though it was true that we needed to keep on the straight and narrow path to get too heaven, we Mormons too the "narrow" part way too seriously. There was still some space for maneuvering, even on the straight and narrow.

I haven't been on the straight and narrow for years, and yet sometimes, I find myself putting one foot in front of the other like a woman on a tightrope, scared to death of a misstep. I also occasionally become convinced that whatever decision I make now will affect me the REST OF MY LIFE. That's how I was raised. For example, we were told over and over again that the reason we were supposed to be friends with other Mormons was because that when we were old enough to date, we would date our friends, and then marry the people we date, so bam! Non-Mormon friendships inevitably lead to unhappiness and misery which will last for the REST OF YOUR LIFE.

So, if admitting that I take myself too damn seriously is only part of the solution, what's the rest of it?